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She curled up unable to stop crying, terrified he would give her up, wouldn’t love her, or want her anymore.* * *He walked out of the room and settled down in his den. He had taken her collar off with a heavy heart. He didn’t Want to. But she didn’t deserve it at this time. In no way was she being the Kitty she knew he expected of her. He went to his locked cabinet and took out a package he had planned to gift her with. A new set of cuffs, thinner, more delicate ones, a soft silver instead of the leather. They would form to her perfectly. They were engraved with delicate roses and vines on the front, the other side, the side closest to the Inside of the body.. was engraved with their names. Under their names was a small keyhole for them to be taken on and off. These weren't meant to be taken off. These were for Permanence. Once these went on.. they weren't coming off again. Not if he could help it. If she showed she could learn... showed she was sorry... truly sorry... he would keep. . his love... but it was difficult to accept it in the strange form he wanted it in.I can't say I didn't really enjoy it... I was... even though I am ashamed of it. At first I didn't... everything was mechanical... only to make the act as quick as possible... giving him what he wanted, letting him use my hole for relief, feeling cheap and dirty afterwards, hating myself. But after a couple of days I found it more and more pleasing, and when he started experimenting with my body with his hands, I had my first orgasm. I was very ashamed of myself... but I figured it didn't really matter any longer if I held back. John didn't make any allusions to wanting me anymore. It all started the first night... I was alone in bed, thinking of what would happen in the future with us, a shattered family. John didn't come this night, the first one since we had started making love. I knew he wouldn't... what I didn't expect was to hear Tim's voice at the door."Mom, are you awake?"I hoped he would go.
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